Happy Random Thoughts

I decided that I want to be Carrie Bradshaw. I finally watched Sex and the City the movie. I hadn't really seen much of the series when the movie came out so I didn't watch it in the theaters. But thanks to TBS I have now seen most of the series, sans all the juicy parts. I know a lot of people didn't like it but I did. Everything worked out and everyone ended up happy. Call me a hopeless romantic but I like that. The world needs more happy endings.

It's been over a week since I had any contact with my Canadian. He's currently in Cuba with his boyfriend. Right before leaving for his trip he was offered an amazing job at a university in Canada and things seem to be going well with the boyfriend. He's happy and his life is progressing so I need to do the same. I'm not the best at letting go but it's long past time. We had a great "something" but it's over now. To poorly paraphrase a line from the movie I just watched: not all romances are epic novels, some are short stories but they are just as good.

I have a second coffee date tomorrow. Twice in one week. That's a good thing right? Of course it's a good thing... I need to trust myself. I was worried about him yesterday and stressing about why an older guy would even be interested in me. He's handsome, smart, funny, cultured, and has his act together. I'm a mess and don't even know what I want to be when I "grow up." But then I remembered that I'm the hot young thing everyone wants. I have a LOT to offer! I've been swatting guys away for so long that it's become second nature to me and I don't even realize I'm doing it. I have no room to bitch about being alone since I'm alone because I choose to be. I want someone to be with but I'm not going to compromise. It's funny... the other night I was cooking dinner for myself and some guy asked me if I wanted to meet up for a movie. I had no desire to go out. I had no desire for him to come here. I had no desire to do anything other than have the evening I had planned for myself. There is nothing wrong with a night at home doing things that make you happy. Could it be that I enjoy being single? Nah... But I'm not unhappy either. Regardless, it's time for a change.

Oh, the modesty of this one... ;-)