I've had a lot going on lately. I'm not sure how to digest any of it or even if I can or should. One thing is certain though... I am my own worst enemy and over think EVERYTHING. Seriously... "Oh, he hung back to walk with me instead of his other friends... what does that mean?" Fuck. Seriously... I would say I need my head examined except I seem to be the token non-psychology phd student when I go out lately and I can say with some certainty that my head is just fine. So... a recap of my week/end.
Work sucked this week. Everyone was pissy and irrational and demanding. I have an exhibit due by the end of the month but I'm getting no feedback and nobody remembers to do anything unless it was something I mentioned in passing weeks ago and changed my mind and gave very specific instructions that should have trumped the random thought weeks ago. My boss (who I actually really like) has been making a lot of seemingly irrational decisions lately that boil down to a lot more work. A coworker (who I also really like) has been making irrational demands. I'm in the middle of like 800 projects and if one more person asks me to drop everything and work on something for them, my head will actually explode. *pop!!* I'm almost never worried about my job or stressed... I hope this doesn't last long.
Friday night I went out with my new gal palls and had a Bloody Mary. It was delicious and just what I needed. I only saw "the guy" very briefly and then he invited me out to hang out with him later in the night. I declined and stayed home alone and watched The Princess and the Frog. I feel like I made the right decision. ;-)
I saw "him" the next day for a pre-game party at his house that was also a birthday party for his roommate. I ate a fried Twinkie, I drank too much beer, too quickly and then drunk dialed my mom at like 6:00 in the evening. Classy... They all went to the game and I parted ways to go to another birthday party complete with an Indian feast. I love Indian food. Seriously... so good. Around 11:00 I sobered up and walked my ass home. All 22 blocks home. It was a beautiful night though, so it was nice.
Sunday... I got up and went to church. I was the worship assistant today, which is still weird to me but nice. After church I went grocery shopping and then had some lunch. I had big plans to get a lot of work done but didn't at any point. I went for a long walk with a friend and the dogs. It was beautiful out this weekend. August beautiful. By now we've usually had a hard freeze if not a snow storm and everything is dead and it's practically winter. I'm glad I enjoyed the warmth today. I still haven't done any homework... but nothing is due until Tuesday and that's like days away right? ;-)
Ok... so... reading this... I notice a theme. "the guy" Fuck that. I was happy and content with my life. I even decided that I didn't want him at some point and now I'm reading novels into his slightest inconsequential actions.
Here are my plans for myself and just for me: I'm going to yoga because it makes me happy. I'm saving money for a potential trip to West Hollywood/ Spain in May. I'm enjoying the company of my friends but not stressing about it. I'm going to create a beautiful exhibit at work. I'm going to continue kicking ass in my class. I'm going to take one other class and finish my thesis next semester. I should know if I can take my last class this summer very soon. I could be done by June. That is awesome. Then what? Who knows. Whatever I want. :-)
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